(Almost) Second Trimester!

I’m almost at the end of the first trimester. My 13th week will finish on Wednesday, and so the second trimester will officially start on Thursday. Just before I go to see my family back home over the weekend 🙂

My mum was panicking a bit about the flight, meaning should I be flying now? But I did explain that it’s perfectly safe. I think she still has some doubts though. But I guess that’s just a part of being a mum, constant worry 😉 I was a bit wary of the scanners at the airport gates, but I read that they are safe. I heard somewhere that you should try and stay away from direct sunlight or cover yourself a bit, as you’re just too close to the sun during a flight, so I’ll just make sure to sit in the middle.

This morning I woke up and started my day as usual with my morning run, then shower and breakfast and then gone to work, and I’ve noticed that somehow I seem to have a bit more energy today. I kept running and rushing this morning as we’ve had an important meeting but I just felt different. For the past two nights I also seemed to need less sleep, and didn’t even feel that bad at 9pm last night before going to bed. I think this might be the start of the “honeymoon phase” of the pregnancy. It’s not quite the second trimester as yet, but I’m starting to feel it a bit. I even thought this morning that I get what some people mean by not feeling pregnant anymore in the beginning of the second trimester. Not that it’s disappointing, it’s nice in a way not to feel nauseous or tired, but I started worrying a bit that maybe something is wrong 😦 I know, I worry a lot!

Tomorrow is our first hospital scan, so this will help me (I hope!) with calming down. As long as everything is ok, I will feel a lot better. Even if my next one is not going to be until beginning of July, I still have another appointment with my midwife before we go away on holiday mid-June.

I was hoping we’d get more pictures in post by now from the scan from the private visit, but they haven’t arrived as yet. I’m suspecting the receptionist hasn’t posted them, and almost lost hope that we will get them. But at least we will get some from the hospital tomorrow.

It will be great to see how the baby has grown for this week and a half! 🙂 And hear its heartbeat once again. I read that you can buy the doppler and hear your baby’s heartbeat yourself from 16 weeks, but sometimes you wont’ be able to and might start to panic that something is wrong, when that’s not really the case. So I don’t think I will get one myself. I’d stress every time I wouldn’t be able to hear the baby, so I don’t think it’s worth it.

Over the weekend my doubts about the future of my relationship with my husband have only increased. And that didn’t make me feel any better. It’s not the life I wanted for my baby, but I also don’t want to spend the rest of my life with someone who makes me feel like I’m worthless. The worst part is he doesn’t understand how this could be the case. All his comments and remarks are supposed to help me, he says. Make me even better. Well, I don’t see it that way. I went through a lot in my life so far, and I didn’t get this far, to allow someone bring me down now. I know that I will be fine on my own, but it’s not what I wanted, and that’s why it’s so hard…

Baby size: Kiwi – (weight 23g, length 7.4 crown to rump) – according to Pregnancy+ app

Bump: Still non-existent unless I’m really bloated 🙂

My Weight: Mostly 48.5kg, sometimes a bit less

Running: 31 minutes now, rather than 32, but at the same speed as before

Cravings: Tomatoes (constantly!), no other strong cravings (thank God!)

Aversions: Broccoli (still!) and most cooked vegetables

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